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Waxing and Waning

I've continued to struggle with my depression.  I'm going to see a new psychiatric nurse soon.  It's challenging for me to discuss medications, as there are so many that I take for different reasons that can be used for different reasons.  Those medications often impact each other and change how the medications impact me.  Right now I'm wanting to change my sleep medication because I can't seem to lose the weight that I put on when I started taking that medication.  My feelings towards medication are often waxing and waning.

Sometimes, I feel good about what my medications are doing for me and how my life is made better by the amazing miracle that is modern science.  Other times, I'm frustrated by the difficulty that is buying, organizing, and taking my medications.  I'm angry that the medications don't get rid of the problems (Get rid of the pain, or make it so I can drive). I'm sad that my health is so that I have to take so many medications.

My chronic illnesses have the biggest impact on how my depression is impacting me. Perfectly Hidden Depression by Margaret Rutherford addresses some of the other things that impact depression.


Perfectly Hidden depression is a well written book, with amazing exercises that I would encourage for many if not most people that are really motivated to work on their depression.  However, I found Margaret Rutherford's tone a bit harsh at times and it rather than the difficult exercises made me want to stop.  Rutherford also, in my opinion, takes liberties about naming perfectly hidden depression without any true examples about how this hidden depression is not, in fact, diagnostically relevant depression.  This book does know it's own boundaries and Rutherford does a good job of encouraging the reader to get IRL support when necessary.  I believe that the exercises in this book may be very helpful for anyone wanting to make changes in their depression, if they can manage the book.

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