Nerd @ 190

In my path to a healthy life, I have been working a lot on the trauma in my childhood.  The things has seem the smallest and have the biggest impact are things that have to do with my identity.  To me, my culture and ethnicity are complex identifiers, the things someone might use to describe me as a person, but mostly the things I use to describe myself.  I'm a white American, with German and Irish ancestry.  I was raised in a mix race family, with Hawaiian, Samoan, Japanese and Black family members. I am disabled, bisexual and a hufflepuff.   I'm culturally Mormon, which means I don't practice the religion but find my way of life impacted by being raised in the community.  These things that define me often have moments in my life that were defining.  At some point or another, I sealed in this identity.  However, many pieces of this identity have been attacked by the outside world.  This is where the work, the healing needs to be done.  So, as I work healing from the tr

Recently I've read a few of books so that you don't have to.   I read the Rabbit Effect.  I found none of the information inside the book to be new to me.  I also found all of the information in the book to be less entertaining to read that most shampoo bottles.  So, feel free to pass on this.  The Parents Guide to Managing Anxiety in Children with Autism is another book that I would encouraging passing on.  First off, I would hate to think that your mentally ill child believes that you are managing them, so don't put this on the shelf. Secondly, there is nothing in this book that isn't in any book on helping your child with anxiety except vignettes that include an autism diagnosis.  Just skip this book and find something that doesn't make it look like you're trying to manage a kid you don't understand. (If you are trying to manage a kid that you don't understand, I think you need to work on that, not on your kid's anxiety.) Theodore the

I had an amazing time last weekend.  Any time that I get to go to a concert is a good time.  Add in any time that I get to go to Seattle is a wonderful time.  Then, I got to spend the weekend with my two best friends and my niece and nephews.  I can't express how much I love it when I get to go home.  I really love everything about being home.  I love the weather, the attitude of the people.  There are very few things I find that can't be made better by being in Seattle. Jonas Brother's Concert was amazing.  The JoBros did not let down.  They had a wonderful mix of new and old songs, were so full of energy and expressive.  Kevin is looking good.  Nick and Joe are always looking good, and appeared to be in a competition over who could do the best vocal acrobatics (I think Nick won.). Felicia Day was also amazing, she is so kind hearted, and it's obvious whenever she speaks in public. She answered so many questions and was truly enchanting.  She shared her weird, en

There appears to be a movement out there in the world of ever changing language to make disability, disorder and other such words out to be "bad words."  I am not living in a world where I'm about to agree with that kind of trouble making. The reality is that both disability and disorder refer to the impacts that an illness or set of symptoms have on the life of a person.  According to the DSM: A disorder is a functional abnormality or disturbance. My disabilities get in the way of how I function in the world.  They make simple things harder or impossible.  That is why they are called disabilities.  If your PTSD doesn't get in the way of how your relationships work out, your work flow, how your family functions then and only then will I go with the PTS garbage that folks are trying to put out into the world.  Also, when it's not impacting your function, I won't expect your American Capitalist insurance to pay for the treatment of your not actually diagnost

I had a very vivid dream last night.  This is not new information for those of you that follow my twitter and my, at least monthly, posts of #LastNightsStrangeDream.  I have strange, vivid nightmares all of the time, and take Prazosin to stop them.  However, something about the misfiring or strange chemistry of my migraines make Prazosin not work.  My dreams are long movies filled with characters from the waking life of my younger self.  Often, those characters spew hatred at me or I watch them die, then I wake up and try to shower away the great disappointment (and regain control over the left side of my body which feels disconnected from me after nights like this).  I don't encourage this behavior.  I encourage a strong sleep schedule and work with therapists and doctors to make it consistent and refreshing. Yet, I know I'm not the only spoonie that struggles with many factors impacting their sleep. The Nocturnal Brain by Dr. Guy Leschziner addresses many of the difficultie